On Being an “Older” Mom

A question I’m getting a lot these days is “What’s it like?”

Meaning: what is it really like to be a new baby mom when you’re over 40?

I am so grateful to my friends who came forward when I was pregnant with Aimee and told me “I was your age when I had my youngest.”  or “I was older than you when I had mine.”  They are all people I already admired as being super “cool” moms and didn’t even know that they were older than I am!  Gives me hope that maybe one day I’ll be a “cool” mom! 🙂

The truth as I see it:

The Bad:
    1. I’m probably never going to be a size 2 again 
    2. Being really tired (eat right and/or take vitamins!)
    3. Not getting anything everything done
    4. Knowing I’ll be ____ years old when she’s ____.
    5. I have to write stuff down or I forget (EVERYTHING)
    6. Medical professionals will treat you like you are crazy and/or an old lady (AMA on your file) and your kids’ teachers will be old enough to be your kids too
The Good:
    1. I don’t care if I’m a size 2 anymore.
    2. I can take a nap and not feel guilty
    3. Dishes in the sink, laundry not done? It gets easier to accept, there will be time later
    4. Staying young at heart! 
    5. Saying “no” to the extras is so much easier
    6. I know how to tell people what I expect and need 
And THE Most IMPORTANT:

Picture of me and my baby girl


I cherish every single minute. 

On Sugar and Spice and Spring Break Sweetness

Our Spring Break-
Well, when I went into the doc on the 24th they said my amniotic fluid was a “2” which is dangerously low.  I had read up on this and really wasn’t too keen on being induced, but everyone said I should go ahead…
so we left the doctor, went home to pack a hospital bag, and went to the hospital.
(When you’re planning a home birth this trip to the hospital is not a happy one.)
They started the Pitocin drip Monday (did a very slow increase and I had almost NO pain without pain meds) and on Wednesday my sweet Aimee was born.   She was “face up” so the actual process was longer than I’d experienced before.

Aimee’s Birthday

I must admit, hospitals (and nurses) have come a LONG way since I had my last baby in a hospital.  Back then, none of the nurses had even witnessed a non-medicated birth, and this time two of my nurses had been midwife or doula trained.  I was allowed to labor wherever and however I wanted (jacuzzi, birthing stools and balls etc.) and my midwife was there to act as my doula.   No one asked me if I needed pain meds which was nice.

When my water broke on Tuesday I was not too happy.  I’d been on Pitocin 24 hrs already and then to see that I did have quite a bit of AF, made me a little angry.  I didn’t want to force my baby to come two weeks early, and then to see that it probably hadn’t been necessary….
To my doctor’s defense, the ultrasound is a horrible method for measuring fluid.  The midwife’s hands probably are your best indicator of everything being okay, and now (too late) I know that.   Make sure you get a second opinion! 
The good news is that my sweet girl is perfectly fine, healthy and happy!  She was 7 lbs 10 oz, so not too small for being two weeks early.

One week old

Now, if I can remember to sleep when baby sleeps (I’m sooo tired!)
My oldest girl did get her drivers’ license (finally) during Spring Break, so maybe my chauffeur days will get easier.
The other kids are so in love with their tiny sister!

Anticipation…

I have now only 12 days until my official due date.

I am so nervous,
mainly because last week the doctor told me my amniotic fluid level was only 4.5, and wanted to induce right then. I’ve been planning another home birth and he was not too happy with that news- so I told him I’d think about it and talk to my hubby and midwife and get back with him.  Midwife put me on bedrest and told me to push water, electrolytes, and up my calories.  Went in to midwife yesterday and she did a non-stress test- all went really well plus my belly grew a LOT in three days!   I think the doc and she are worried because “I’m old.”   (Funny, I don’t feel old yet!)

The feelings you have while preggers after miscarriage are so crazy.  Never a peaceful moment.  I second guess everything and it makes me a little crazy.   (OK, maybe a lot sometimes…)  I’ve been so careful with this pregnancy- I see the midwife, OB, and acupuncturist every week now!

On a lighter note
some sweet friends gave me a fun baby shower last week.
Lots of goodies and great stuff to eat!
I hadn’t been to a baby shower in twelve years!   (You don’t expect many when all your friends are in their late 30’s and up! 🙂  It was fun to get to be silly and look at tiny clothes again.

Tomorrow I go back to OB and he’ll do another ultrasound and see what AFL is.  After doing research I realize this is the new way to get people to be induced, but on the other hand it is truly dangerous if it’s genuinely low (but the ultrasound is not a very accurate measuring method.)

So if it is low tomorrow will be our baby girl’s birthday…
Really hoping all’s well.  I don’t want to force her to come before she’s ready AND I’d love for another home birth.   Plus, we don’t have a name picked out yet! 

Wish us luck!

Surprise! (Or What my Hubby Got for his 21st Anniversary)

On our 21st anniversary I gave my hubby a cute little stick with two lines on it…

Surprise!
(You can get pregnant at 42!  And here I thought menopause might have been the cause of my tiredness and queasy feelings.)

We’ve lost 7 pregnancies in the past,
so obviously we were very leary to tell the kids or even our friends this time.

On our fall break we told the kids why mommy wasn’t riding any rides at the theme parks. 

I’m now 17 weeks pregnant and healthy baby and momma so far.
I’ve been seeing the acupuncturist once a week, regular OB visits, and midwife visits so think I’m covered.  I had to be on progesterone shots for the first 14 weeks, and think that’s the key for me.
(With both my boys I took shots.) 

I’m still scared-
and just now the fear’s wearing thinner allowing myself to be,
So happy,
and So excited.

The funniest part?
My due date is April 1st!

Life is amazingly strange and wonderful!